Controlling Life

I've been reading this book, and it's full of wonderful information. At the same time it comes from a "christian" perspective and the scripture work in it is pretty horrible a lot of the time. It spot quotes verses, takes them out of context and tries to make them mean things different than how they were really intended (and I don't mean in a that scripture is kind of but not really related to that kind of way, but in a that has nothing to do with what you're talking about kind of way). Normally I would put the book down and walk away, but this one was written by psychologists, and as I said the information (beyond the scripture work) is really good. I'm finding it helpful to me and I would imagine it would be to plenty of others that I know. So, I've continued reading, but it has gotten me pondering all kinds of questions about "Christian" perspectives.

On top of reading this book I've had a couple other experiences recently. I came across a blog post where both "Christians" and "Atheists" were posting comments. And, I came across a couple of presentations done by skeptics and scientists. And I've begun to notice something. I'm noticing that a lot of times our perspective on the world isn't about truth as much as faith, and it isn't as much about faith as control. Let me unpack this a bit.

We long to understand life. We want to know the best way to live, how to live and move in the world. We want success, ease, joy, comfort, excitement, and all the other good life has to offer. There's this sense that if I can figure out life, the key to it, the secret, then I can make the most of it and be happy. And we're bombarded by a million perspectives and according to each it is offering the fundamental rubric through which we are told we should ground our being. We can pursue money or power, fame or success, excitement, experiences, adventure or any number of perspectives that can serve as our lens for trying to understand how to conquer life.

And that's what it's really about, control. Some of us are afraid, so we pursue safety. We think if we can just keep things from going wrong everything will be ok. We buy insurance thinking that things will be ok no matter what, because I've got insurance and supplemental insurance. Others pursue fame. We think that if enough people know us, then we will have significance and fulfillment. Others pursue success. We think that if I do something of worth then I'll be of worth. Or, money will allow me to do what I want, then I'll be happy. Or, excitement and adventure will bring me a rush and I'll feel like I'm truly alive.

And to be honest, I'm not ever sure what exactly it is we're seeking. But, we have this sense that there is some kind of void in our lives and we need to do something to get rid of it.

Now, the anchors beneath all of these perspectives tend to gravitate around either religion or science. Either what we see and can measure and test is all that there is or there's something more. One of these two tend to lie underneath whichever perspective(s) we choose. Something is going to be the thing through which all that we do will be grounded, thus both are a type of faith. What we're looking for we tend to find. How else could such brilliant people come to such different conclusions on almost everything (I'm thinking specifically about a debate I recently saw between two unbelievably intelligent men regarding whether moving toward nuclear energy is a good idea or not - and they directly contradicted each other in their basic statistical information. In the end it seems to comes down to an in faith value judgment on the part of each.)

Science is concerned with the "natural world". And because of it we've learned much and made great advances. We need reason, we need science because it pushes us toward truth. It doesn't accept doctrine or myth. Thanks to science the faith of the Church is more accurate. We know that the Earth isn't the center of the universe like we once thought, like our interpretation of scriptures once said it had to be. At the same time most of us have this nagging sense that something isn't completely right about science. We don't completely trust it because yesterday's miracle drug now has law advertisements telling us that if we took that drug and developed a certain condition we are entitled to a settlement. We're hesitant to completely trust science in a world where today's dream come true miracle medicine could be tomorrows nightmare. We have this depths of our bones understanding that love is more than chemicals in our brain, I, my conscious self, am more than simply mind meat, and in between those two realities, the tangible and the intangible, the scientific and the philosophical lies something real, something meaningful. So, we look to religion.

But, oftentimes popular "Christian" culture doesn't seem to help. Between the tangible and intangible lies an unspeakable mystery. Yet by and large we aren't invited to step into it. Rather we are given easy answers to questions for which there are no easy answers. Life is wild, it can't be controlled. The Divine is untamed, beyond us in such a way that we never know what to expect. Yet, instead of admitting this and inviting people to delve into the mystery, into the wonder, we offer a religious science of "timeless principles" that are "true" because "the bible says so" all the while forgetting that scripture is always interpreted, rarely does it ever just "say so." Or, we take something God once spoke to someone and we take that as a promise for us here and now, because if it's in the bible it must be for me specifically. But, because scripture is always interpreted, what's really being offered isn't the mysteries of God and the universe, but rather just another perspective filled with over-simplified answers to make us feel like we are in control of life. And that's really what lies underneath all of this, our fear and anxiety and attempts at controlling both life and God. We do everything we can to place life and God in our little box of timeless truths and eternal promises. But, God cannot be tamed and life is beyond our control. We can influence life, but we can't control it. There are truths, but we will be infinitely exploring them because they are mysteries too large for us to attain. Much of what we talk about as truths are more like guidelines, things that will work by and large, but not something that is a guarantee. Because we were never intended to be in control. We are to guide and direct and influence, but you can do everything right and things still go wrong.

But, what I think I'm beginning to learn might be that learning to control and conquer life isn't the point. It's fools gold that only disappoints. Some of the perspectives will work for some people, some will work for others, and some will only work for a little while. But, all they allow us to do is stay so busy that you run from the void. If controlling life isn't the point, what is? I don't know, I'm in my twenties and live in Alabama. I don't even really understand the theory of relativity. But, I'm pretty sure finding the point begins with embracing the mystery between the tangible and intangible. It involves going beyond the easy answers on both sides of the tangible/intangible coin to that place where something real and significant lies. There is something meaningful in searching and living, in joy and wonder. Good can be produced even out of bad. Living is really about being open to what's happening around you here and now, communing with the untamable God at this moment, and trusting that whatever chaos life throws your way this God is bigger than it. It's about learning in the midst of it all to trust this God and ground your life in your connection with this large, wild, untamable Being who often can be found in the most ordinary of places and moments. Even this one.

On Business Marketing

I'm not much of a fan of advertising, by and large I'm against marketing. I struggle with the balance between making sure things are known about and much of the manipulation that goes on in marketing today. I want to know when a product I'm excited about is being released, and I always enjoy a funny commercial. But, ads are designed to capture (and steer) your emotions. I fear that having so many ads telling us that our lives are deficient (until of course we buy their product) has a negative psychological impact on us. And of course the products never deliver what the ad promises implicitly or explicitly (I've never enjoyed Herbal Essence shampoo as much as the people in the commercials). And I've been amazed that the message has gone from implicit to explicit. The, "buy our product and you will be happy" message used to be implicit, but with the recession all that has changed. Walmart - Save Money Live Better, Best Buy - Buy Happy, and the list goes on.

In a world where many businesses are solely about the bottom line, so much so to the point of down right being unethical, there has also been what is for me a welcomed trend. There have been businesses springing up that aren't simply about making money, but also making the world a better place. For example, when you buy a pair of Tom's Shoes a child in a third world country gets a pair as well. This mindset has begun to spill over onto marketing strategies.

I recently discovered HotelsCombined.com who is doing something I think is a stroke of creative genius. Instead of spending their money on a traditional marketing campaign they are donating that money to charities. So, I join their facebook page then write on their wall where I want their donation to go, or post a tweet that contains HotelsCombined.com in it, or I do a blog post like this and send them an email to make them aware of it, and they send a donation to the charity of my choice.

As you may know, I'm trying to raise money to build a well in Africa for my 30th birthday, so I've begun the Herston 30 for 30 campaign. The idea is that I invite friends to share in my 30th birthday by giving $30 to blood water mission with Herston 30 for 30 in the comments box. So, I have facebook, I have tweeted, and now I have blogged, and they should be sending $35 to Blood Water Mission on my behalf.

I know very little about this company. I haven't used their service (although I did do a quick hotel search on their site and found some pretty good prices). I can't vouch for them beyond what I think is a brilliant marketing campaign. But, for me that is enough to give them a try next time I'm shopping for a hotel. I just find it inspiring to see a company think beyond traditional marketing and use that money to support good causes. If you would like to have them donate to your cause go to http://www.hotelscombined.com/Charity.aspx

iPhone 4, Technology, and Relationships

I've always been fascinated with gadgets, but I am a fan of very few products or companies. However, after working with/on computers for a few years I was really impressed when I experienced the OSX Mac. Since I knew Windows well I was afraid I wouldn't know what to do when when a Mac broke. Therefore I waited until they came out with Macs using the Intel Chipset so I could put Windows on it if I needed. But, I was so impressed with how much better it operated that it drives me crazy to use a PC with all it's freezing and crashing. If there were to be an operating system problem I still wouldn't know what to do, but after several years with this machine I haven't had to. So, I'll admit, I am a fan of Apple.

At the same time, I'm aware that Apple is not perfect, it is a company, it's out to make money. They tend to leave a few bugs in their first generation so that they can improve it for the next (like the recessed headphone jack on the 1st gen iPhones). This (along with money) is why I don't plan to get a 1st gen iPad. I figure I'll let them work out the bugs and we can get a 2nd generation or something. I'm still disappointed about the downgraded iMovie I was stuck with last time I upgraded iLife. But, faults aside, they do make darn good machines and I'm a fan. I love my 1st gen iPhone (even with the depressed headphone jack), I can have my iPod and phone all in one device, there's a full keyboard, and the calendar is fantastic and syncs with the one I use on my Mac.

I am really excited about the new iPhone 4. An led flash for the new 5 megapixel camera, taking HD video (and being able to edit it on the phone), the new display, and especially "facetalk" where you can actually do Jetson's or Skype type video phone calls from a mobile phone - finally, unbelievable. I think this is going to be an amazing device. I would love to get one, and anyone reading is more than welcome to purchase one for me.

Being a techie, I love technology, but I also realize that often our discoveries technologically tend to progress faster than our discoveries ethically. I love the idea of being able to video call with the family if I'm away somewhere, or be able to see what friends are seeing as they are on a trip. At the same time I'm slightly disturbed by what this could mean. I watched their ad and saw a father watching his child crawl, grandparents watching a grandchild graduate, a father watch an ultrasound, and I couldn't help but think, why are they having to use a video phone? Why aren't they there, why aren't they present?

The answer, because they don't have to be. They have a video phone and now they can give their presence to the things that are really important to them while not being completely absent from the relationships that matter most. I know that's a little harsh, it's really just to make this point, does technology actually expose our priorities? I understand there are times when we can't be somewhere and having this technology would be great. I have a cousin who had a birthday party the weekend before last and I couldn't make it. It would have been great to be on the other end of a video phone and be passed around to everybody and quickly catch up. But, the only way I would not have been there for my kids ultrasounds would have been if I didn't have a pulse.

Most of what we communicate does not come through our words, rather it's how we say it. The medium we use is the message. An extreme example: Have a nice day written on a card communicates one thing, having it written on the side of a bomb communicates something completely different. Calling someone on their wedding day let's them know your thinking about them. Driving five hours to be at the wedding, tell them congratulations, and give them a hug communicates something similar only in a more powerful way.

Technology has the ability to help us keep in touch with people. This is why I enjoy facebook, blogs, and twitter. But, they can only do so much. As Dr. Barnhardt says, they are great for maintaining relationships, keeping in touch, but they have a hard time actually strengthening or deepening relationships. And, if you're spending twenty minutes checking the status of hundreds of friends, that's twenty minutes that you're not spending with the people that are actually there, present with you in that moment.

So, don't get me wrong. I think the new iPhone is going to be awesome. I would love to get one. I love the part of the ad where one guy talks about his kids going off to college and him being able to not only hear their voice but look at their eyes and make sure they're ok. I'm a fan of technology and love that it can do wonderful things.

At the same time there is also the possibility that instead of us running the technology the technology will run us. There is the possibility that we will be connected to so many people that we won't truly be connected to anyone.

Exciting News

As you may or may not know we have been in a bit of a time of transition the last couple years. This has pressed me into a bit of soul searching that I'm still in the midst of. But, in this process I am forming values and goals for myself which hopefully you'll hear about for years to come. I want to invite you to be a part of one of my first endeavors.

One of my great hopes is that when my life ends this world will have been a better place because I was a part of it. Like the boy saving starfish on the beach to whom the old man says there are too many for you to save them all and the boy responds but I can save that one, I know that I cannot save the world from all the things that plague it. I know that compared to all the issues in the world my impact will be small. However, I also have come to realize that the people who are truly changing the world would never say they were. They simply engage in the hard drudgery that matters most. Hopefully, while people will not be able to say that I changed the world, there will be people who will be able to say that I changed their world.

I think the greatest impact that can physically be made on our world is that of providing safe, accessible water in places where people are having to walk miles to gather water from contaminated mud holes and engaging the third world in microfinance initiatives.

Therefore, for my upcoming 30th birthday I am asking my friends not to give me presents. Instead I want as many people as possible to give $30 toward providing clean drinking water for those without it through Blood Water Mission. Of course if you are welcome to give more if you want. But, if 200 people give $30 each we should be able to build a well for a village.

The basic formula is that $1 provides clean water for 1 person for 1 year (that's less than the price of one bottle of water at most gas stations or a quarter of the price of a bottle of water at Starbucks - just kidding I don't know how much water costs at Starbucks, who would buy water when there's vanilla bean frappuccinos?). So, what we're able to do will depend upon how much is given. But, I would love to see us raise enough to create a solution (maybe build a well) that will provide water to a village for generations.

I'm sure we'll have some sort of party that you can give at, but if you would like to give online click here or go to www.bloodwatermission.com click on the donate tab, and put "Herston 30 for 30" in the comments box. All donations are tax deductible, so don't feel constrained to only giving $30.

Make my 30th birthday a happy one and save some people's lives.

Jason Mraz is right or The movement of faith and why prosperity preaching is wrong

This is a post that leans heavily on Luke Chapter 8, so you might want to read it before or after.  I primarily use the TNIV version here, and I have put letters in bold for those who want a quick reference for the various streams of thought P for path, R for rocks, T for Thorns and G for good.  With that said, here we go.

A farmer once went out to sow some seed.  (P) As he was scattering the seed some fell along the path where birds came and snatched it up.  (R) Some fell among rocky ground where it sprang up quickly but when the sun would bear down, it would also wither quickly because it had no root.  (T) Some fell among thorns, so they grew but they didn’t produce because the weeds choked the life out of them.  (G) Then some fell on good soil and produced more than was originally sown.

Jesus told this parable then explained that he was the farmer sowing the seed of the message of the Kingdom of God.  (P) He said that the seed that fell along the path is about people who hear the message but “the evil one snatches it away from their hearts” (primarily they don’t want to hear it or they are caught in behaviors they don’t want to give up).  (R) The seed that fell among rocky ground are those who at first receive it with great joy but when trouble or persecution come they quickly fall away.  (T) The seed that fell among the thorns are those who accept the message but then “the worries of this life and the deceitfulness of wealth” choke it.  (G) The seed that fell on good soil are those who “hear the word and understand it.”  They are the ones who produce a crop, more than was originally sown.

In this parable I see a few things going on here.  In pastoring churches and in my life I have noticed some patters to faith.  (P) God speaks to everyone, however everyone isn’t listening.  At the same time, some of us are.  

(R) Now, I’m not 100% sure of what all contributes to this, maybe it’s the really great personal stories we hear, maybe it’s the idea that we accept Jesus then whenever we die we go to heaven and escape trouble and that idea of escaping trouble then somehow bleeds over into ideas about our relationship with God here and now, maybe it’s an American pre-disposition, or maybe it’s the christian culture bubble and prosperity preaching, I don’t know.  But usually along with learning of God’s love for us we also get a message of, “If you’ll get your act together and get cool with God then everything will go well.  You will prosper, God will protect you, your family, and your friends, and you will be happy.”  The problem is, it’s not true.  

In Matthew, Jesus gives the sermon on the mount.  At the end of this unbelievably extraordinary  teaching he says that those who hear his words and put them into practice are like a man who builds his house upon rock.  And when the storms come his house will stand firm.  It doesn’t say that there will be no storms.  Storms are assumed, it’s about being able to weather them.  

Somehow we manage to read a lot of great things in the scriptures about people following God and things going well for them, but we miss their struggles along the way.  We see the day of Pentecost and miss the martyrdom of Stephen.  No one more fully walked with God than Jesus and he was crucified!  Almost all the disciples were eventually killed for their beliefs and somehow we miss that and think that Jesus is our life’s easy button.

And it’s one thing for us to pick this up on our own, but when we have churches and preachers who tell you this specifically and it doesn’t happen people walk away from church, faith, God, and the whole thing.  We often become cynical and jaded and it didn’t have to be that way.  Prosperity preaching is stuck in the early part of the process of faith, and it produces type two soil (rocky ground).  (R)(T) But, someone somewhere figured out that if they told people what they wanted to hear they would show up, watch their program, buy their books, and/or give.  It’s the easy shortcut.  We can have the best of intentions and yet choose the shortcut, go about the right things in the wrong ways, see success and at the same time leave devastation.  This is why pastors, churches, and denominations can not seek effectiveness or success as their goal (and I’m defining effectiveness as bodies, budgets, buildings and/or saving an institution of a local church or denomination).  Pursuing success leads to shortcuts.  It is counter productive and brings devastation.  However, pursuing faithfulness leads to fruitfulness (forgive my old preacherly cliche alliteration demons coming out). 

But, this is part of the process of faith.  (R) We hear of God’s love and we accept it with joy thinking it’s all going to be good now, then trouble comes.  And the question becomes do we stick with it?  Do we continue to turn in the direction we have begun, toward God rather than away?  Do we decide that we must have had some beliefs wrong at this part of the process and seek to understand struggle and brokenness in the faithful life?  Or, do we walk away from the whole thing?

After the joy phase comes the struggle phase.  (T) And after the struggle phase comes the worry phase.  At this point we’ve seen that what we thought before, that God would keep storms from coming, is false.  We have this sense that anything in life that can happen can happen to us.  Cancer, car accidents, anything that can happen has the potential of happening to me regardless of whether I’m walking with God or not.  Our simple binary understanding of, walk with God only good things will happen, don’t walk with God only bad things will happen, has been destroyed.  We had given our lives to God, but God didn’t come through, didn’t protect us, and while we might not have completely rejected the whole God thing, we came to some kind of understanding that this world is broken.  Good and bad happen to everyone.  

And we begin to realize that you can take the shortcut and succeed, that sometimes the wicked do prosper.  In this moment we are faced with a new temptation.  We may or may not still believe and affirm creeds, but the temptation becomes to take our lives back in the ways we live it in the day to day workings.  

I love the way this is worded, “the worries of this life,” and I particularly love this phrase, “the deceitfulness of wealth.”  Jesus is adamant that there is more to life than this life.  And I know this has been used in the most trite and cliche of ways, but part of the key for Jesus is realizing there’s something bigger going on than our small little lives we get lost in.  God is up to something bigger than the things we worry about and according to Jesus (and Paul) if we’re on board with God, in the end, in the bigger story, in the life beyond this life, it’s all going to work out.  At some point everyone dies, but in the end everything will belong, none of the pain and tragedy will have been wasted.  

Our job is to live in such a way that we bring heaven to earth (think, thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven).  Money makes us feel secure, it makes us feel safe.  But, according to Jesus it’s a deception.  All the money in the world won’t save you or your family or your friends from tragedy.  If or when the worst happens, it isn’t going to matter how fat your bank account is.  And it is this worry, this pursuing of safety and security and wealth that can get us lost in our little lives and contribute to the brokenness of the world. These are things that can drive heaven from earth.

(G) But, our other option is to continue to turn as we did to begin with.  To continue to seek to understand this message of the kingdom.  The word repent literally means to turn or return.  Jesus’ primary message was to turn or return because the kingdom of heaven is near.  It’s a perpetual turning.  When we think we’ve got it all figured out and we quit seeking, we quit exploring, we shut ourselves off from this kingdom.  At the same time it is a continual returning, returning toward the God who creates and loves us, and returning the world to the way God intends it to be.  If we can do this, if we can continue to explore, if we can continue to patch the holes in our understanding of this faith that is bigger than our comprehension, if we can press on beyond the fallacies that we become aware of as the struggles come, as we’re tempted to take the easy way, as we’re tempted to take the shortcuts and false safeties, if we can press on beyond the struggles, the worries of this life, and the deceitfulness of wealth, then and only then do we truly produce a crop.  

And what we will find is that just like the seasons, troubles come and troubles go.  Everyone experiences good and bad.  Everyone dies at some point.  Tragedy befalls us all at some time or another.  We can worry about it and expend a lot of energy, but we are really quite limited in what we can actually do to prevent or stop it.  We can seek after money expecting safety but we will find that it fails.  And through this process we will find that it is this very process itself that cultivates the heart into good soil.  That by “persevering” through this process a crop is produced.

This is the pascal mystery.  This is the story of the God who became flesh and dwelt among us.  The one who teaches and shows us how to bring heaven to earth, who walked more closely with God than any other, and despite doing everything right suffered and died.  It is only through this experience only through that death that resurrection occurred. 

And here’s another thing, the gospels were brilliantly written with unbelievable intentionality.  If we look at this parable in Luke (ch. 8) what we see are direct examples of each of these types of soil in reverse order. (G) First is in a parable of a lamp on a stand (good and noble heart that understans/good soil that produces a crop).  (T) The second is Jesus’ mothers and brothers who are caught up in the worries of this life (seed among thorns/weeds).  (R) The third is the disciples caught in the storm (troubles/seed on the rocky soil).  (P) And the fourth is a man who is possessed by demons (engaging in various “sinful” behaviors was believed to open one up to demon possession, which would be hearing the word but having it snatched away by the evil one or the seed among path).  

Now in the parable itself the view is somewhat negative, most of the seed doesn’t produce.  Yet in the stories that follow no matter which type of soil they were, in reality Jesus was bigger than their issues.  Eventually Jesus’ mother and brothers believe, Jesus calms the storm and the disciples go on to do great things, and Jesus drives the demons out of the man (and history goes on to tell us that his witness leads to one of the major early churches).  It’s as if Luke is telling us, no matter where you are in this process it’s never too late.  

Then, as if to drive this point home, he tells us of a story of Jesus bringing a dead girl back to life and healing a woman who had an issue of bleeding for years. She had tried every option and was now hopeless beyond Jesus.  If it were ever too late, it would be too late for these two.  And yet, Jesus is bigger than even their problems, even death.  It’s as if Luke is telling us that with Jesus it is never too late.  You can always turn, you can always return.  Don’t give up, there is more to life than this life and Jesus is bigger than whatever your problems or hang-ups or, or wherever you are stuck in the process.

If you’ll just keep turning, what you’ll find is that, just like you have to turn soil in order to make it able to produce vegetation, in this process you are turning the soil of your heart.  It won’t be easy, bad things will happen, and the temptation to take your life back into your own hands will overwhelm you through the pain.  But, in then end none of it will have been in vain, nothing will have been wasted.  Everything belongs, all of life is a gift, and that resurrection is waiting.  In the words of Jason Mraz, life is wonderful.

Conan O'Brien's Dance off with Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert